This is my life. and its perfection.

this powder molded into shapes that have fallen in my hand.

the life takers.

i have once seen the face of happiness

may my God be with me

as i travel the journey into the deepest of my fears.

and when i turn my head to the west to greet Gabriel joyfully sounding his trumpet

may we stand together with strength, though His is much greater than mine.

for i am ignoring the sound of distant drumming of the coming future.

the end of me, my life is the only sound that rings into my ears.

i see the smile of my past frozen in pictures of happiness, hanging on my wall.

i look to my smile of the future

frozen forever on my death-taken lips.

ashes to ashes and dust to dust.

take this power given to me for unknown reasons.

take it back to where it came from, i am undeserving.

i can not stay in this life any longer.

there is a force greater than me speaking the truth

and they have finally called my name.

nothing i am leaving behind do i regret

i wish the best for them and their hate.

for it is their hate i despise and their love that was ungiven i needed.

for i loved the love that never was gave to me.

and in the end that love has destroyed me.

i have traveled beyond myself, so lay me down to sleep.

for in sleep there is darkness, and in darkness i have found trust.

the trust no one else i have found can give.

i thought i changed, i thought i understood

i thought i was loved.

but no more.

if i can face my fear tonight, goodbye.

all i know for certain is that i loved.

do not cry

grandma, i will be with you again soon

this has been in the back of my mind for a few months now

and it is time to do what i think is best

</3 cally